To understand the question “Why can’t I understand my emotions?” it is necessary to compare between emotions and thoughts. We need to understand the difference because they have different roles and characteristics, and people often confuse between them. Both, emotions and thoughts, are essential in human experience. They serve different purposes and operate in unique ways. Besides, knowing the distinctions is crucial for emotional intelligence and personal growth. The following lines will explore the characteristics of emotions and thoughts, the roles they play in our lives, and how recognizing their differences can lead to answer the previous question.
Characteristics of Emotions
Emotions are natural responses to stimuli. They are often provoked without conscious thoughts. They are responsible for our states that reflect our moods and feelings. Some emotional characteristics are:
- Spontaneity: Emotions often arise on their own accord without our conscious intervention. We experience their existence in our bodies as something happen to us, not something we choose.
- Temporariness: Emotions life span can be short duration. They sometimes last just few seconds. However, if the duration exceed hours, then it is a mood not an emotion.
- Physical sensations: Emotions are tied to physical sensations of the body. The sensations are a feeling that we are consciously aware of. For instance, stress triggers chemicals in the brain that affects the gut that may cause the colon to react.
- Behavioral motivation: Emotions have a huge impact on motivating much of our behaviors.
Characteristics of Thoughts
Thoughts, on the other hand, are mental processes that are responsible for reasoning, logic, and analytical thinking. Some characteristics of thoughts are:
- Conscious and unconscious: Some thoughts are conjured intentionally, while other thoughts operate beneath the surface.
- Abstract: Thoughts are not tied to concrete objects such as the body, unlike the emotions which are tied to physical sensations of the body. Since they are not tied to the body, we cannot feel them.
- Behavior: thoughts often influence our actions.
- Continuity: Thoughts can last for a longer period, if they are needed of analyzing and reasoning.
“Emotions are not created to be understood; they are created to be felt.”
The Role of Emotions and Thoughts
For emotions and thoughts, there are many different roles; however, each has a major role. The most important role that emotions play is adding reality to events and situations that we experience. An event cannot be considered an experience without emotions attached to it. Nearly all the hardships we go through impact us because emotions have been produced in response. People who are rarely triggered do not experience the hardships in the same way as those who are easily triggered. They forget negative events or situations shortly after, while easily triggered people dwell on the memory for a longer time.
Thoughts, on the other hand, give you a preview of anything you think of before it may appear in your reality. The preview includes imagination, planning, and even potential problems. They allow you to explore potential outcomes, weigh options, and envision future scenarios. By engaging in reflective thinking, thoughts help you anticipate challenges, devise strategies, and make informed decisions, shaping the path you take and the reality you create.
Recognizing the Differences
The question “Why can’t I understand my emotions?” may contain three different meanings. The first meaning: I want to understand my emotions because I believe it is the only way to face them. The second meaning: I want to understand my emotions to find out why they bother me. The last meaning: I want to understand my emotions to calm them. Typically, thoughts are used in this process to understand emotions. However, emotions are not created to be understood; they are created to be felt.
As we have seen, emotions and thoughts are entirely dissimilar. They are separate, distinct entities. Using thoughts to face emotions, find out why they disturb us, or calm them is futile. Thoughts are not made to understand emotions or soothe them. The role of thoughts is confined to imagination, planning, and problem-solving, whereas emotions are made for making our experiences feel real. We can only use our thoughts (intellect) to identify which emotions we are currently experiencing.
Conclusion
Understanding the difference between emotions and thoughts is key to emotional intelligence and personal growth. Emotions are meant to be felt and experienced, not intellectually dissected or controlled. By recognizing that emotions and thoughts serve distinct roles, we can better navigate our emotional landscape. Emotions add depth and reality to our experiences, while thoughts help us plan and solve problems. Accepting and experiencing emotions as they arise, without trying to control or suppress them, can lead to a healthier and more balanced life. Instead of seeking to understand emotions through thoughts, we should focus on being present with our emotions and allowing them to naturally flow through us. This approach fosters emotional resilience and a deeper understanding of our inner selves.
